I have found the ultimate symbol of motherhood! it’s an object that tells the whole story of how mums live and what they sacrifice!
It’s so perfect that I think it should be a new emoji.. used as a symbol to show the never ending responsibilities and lack of freedom we get after becoming a mum.
So what is it? ……
Noise cancelling headphones!!!
Yup.. Never before has an object described the motherload so well!
I won some really posh noise cancelling headphones a few years ago. They are beautiful and simply fantastic bits of kit. But after a few weeks I realised that I’ll never actually be able to use them! … like… NEVER!
When in a mums life can you safely cut out the entire world? There is no time you can cancel out the world! You have to be ALWAYS on duty!
For example…I can’t listen to music or a book in bed in case a child wakes up or has a bad dream.. how would I hear them? What if the cat starts puking or someone tries to break in? Who will hear that? Who will deal with it?
When in the day can I wear them? I work from home so I’m always listening for the phone or the door, let alone the kids…I’m always on guard! I always have to be fully aware of my surroundings!
I’d like to say my husband could hear things but he hears nothing! He has the inbuilt luxurious knowledge that I’m on guard and so he doesn’t have to be.
He can come in, get a shower, watch the tv, have an hour long shit and totally switch off without any kind of concern about what will happen in his absence. He can just disappear without any word… imagine that!
So ingrained is this notion that he’s a member of the house but not responsible for the house, even when asked to ‘look out‘ for the kids while I take a shower or take any time out (I’m taking like a wee or putting the bin out) he forgets or zones out without realising.. it’s just in his psyche now.. “someone else is looking after things”
So yeah… I have my fancy £500 noise cancelling headphones 🎧 at the side of my bed in a fancy case. I’ll never use them but they are mine….
The epitome of insult was when, on complaining about how I’d never get use them (because I had to carry the burden of constant responsibility was) the response was…“ well can I have them then?” Are you kidding me??? That’s the solution?
Not ‘ I see your point.. I’ll step up and start taking my share’… oh no instead I got “ I see your point, I’ll have them then”
So from now on when I’m talking about the motherload I’m going to use the headphones 🎧 emoji as my symbol of my lost freedom!
One day I’ll book a hotel and just go away for 24 hours.. just to be alone with my headphones! 🎧